Writing Together and Alone
What does social balance in writing look like and feel like to you? Between the allure of solitary writing, the intimacy of a writing partnership, and the comfort of writing in community, where’s your own personal sweet spot?
To explore these questions and others like them, I invited writers to join me in September 2024 for a free WriteSPACE Special Event on Writing Together and Alone. I guided participants through a sequence of reflective exercises to help them find their own ideal balance between solitary writing and social support, and to discover some research-based strategies for establishing an ideal writing partnership, group, or community. I also offered a sneak peek at my new WriteSPACE Travel Grants, which I’m offering to members of my WriteSPACE community who don’t want to travel this challenging road on their own.
Here’s WriteSPACE Event Manager Amy Lewis’ personal account of this special event:
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I think most of us can relate to a time in our writing lives when we felt socially unbalanced—the lone wolf, tucked away in isolation, writing a dissertation and hardly leaving the cave… the circus performer parent, juggling responsibilities with no time to write alone… or the social butterfly, flitting between too many commitments, struggling to maintain focus.
The challenge is to find a social balance for your writing—a harmony between the solitude that strengthens focus and the social encounters that ignite new ideas. Your unique context plays a role in this balance too. Helen pointed out that writers in the humanities often work in isolation, in contrast to the more collaborative research environment enjoyed by scientific teams.
So how do you know what works best for you? And how can you create a sense of group motivation, camaraderie, and peer support for your writing? These are the questions Helen’s wonderful workshop helped us explore.
We began by reflecting on the concepts of extroversion and introversion. You may be familiar with Christine Miserandino’s ‘spoon theory’. A similar metaphor can help you identify whether you're an introvert, omnivert who is introvert-leaning or extrovert-leaning, or extrovert. The "coin metaphor" illustrates this: an introvert starts the day with ten coins and spends one on every social interaction, while an extrovert starts with none and gains a coin after each interaction.
Achieving social balance in writing means recognizing where you fall on the introvert-extrovert spectrum—this is your strength—and then complementing that strength by embracing the opposite. For example, if you’re an introvert, how are you incorporating social interactions to support your writing? If you’re an extrovert, how are you carving out space for solitary reflection on your work?
Helen then guided us through an exercise that asked us to reflect on three forms of pleasurable writing: solitary writing, writing with a friend, and writing in community. Henry David Thoreau wrote in his famous book Walden: "I had three chairs in my house: one for solitude, two for friendship, and three for society." There’s a common misconception that Thoreau was a hermit, indifferent to others, but in fact, he hosted gatherings and was actively engaged with his neighbours and community—he, too, sought social balance.
After this reflective writing, we discussed how to design the ideal writing group tailored to your own ‘Writing BASE’, which addresses the behavioural, artisanal, social, and emotional dimensions of writing. Striking the right balance between solitude and social interaction is essential to a fulfilling writing practice. And your balance will look different from any other writer’s.
I encourage you to watch the full video to engage with Helen’s reflective writing prompts and take the BASE quiz, which can help you identify your strengths in writing practice.
A big thank you to Helen for designing such an insightful workshop. I look forward to seeing you all at the next Special Event!
WriteSPACE and WS Studio members can find the recording of the Special Event in their Video library.
Not a member? Register to receive an email with a link to the video of the first hour.
Better yet, join the WriteSPACE with a free 30 day trial, and access our full Library of videos and other writing resources as part of your membership plan.